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  • Translator: Phil Marshall Reviewer: Yang Xinzhe

    如果我跟你說,

  • What if I said to you

    在臺北監獄裡面,

  • that the violent criminals and sex offenders inside Taipei Prison

    服刑的性侵暴力犯,

  • are much better at controlling their emotions

    他們的情緒控制能力,

  • than our university students?

    比我們的大學生要好很多。

  • Would you believe me?

    你們相信嗎?

  • Since I do psychological research,

    從事心理學的研究,

  • I often have the opportunity to go to different places

    讓我有機會到不同的地方,

  • and get to know different kinds of people.

    常常認識不一樣的人。

  • Over the past few years,

    在過去幾年當中,

  • in addition to working with university students,

    除了有機會能夠跟大學生互動之外,

  • I've also visited Taipei Prison often.

    臺北監獄,也是我常常進出的地方。

  • What I just mentioned is the result of our latest study.

    剛剛所跟大家提到的是,

  • When we started,

    我們最近的一項研究結果。

  • we were a little surprised too.

    一開始的時候,

  • Emotion. What is it exactly?

    也有點讓我們驚訝。

  • Is it good or bad?

    情緒,它到底是甚麼?

  • Do you want to have them?

    它是好還是不好?

  • I started working part time when I was in high school.

    你會想要擁有它嗎?

  • I was told very early on,

    我從高中開始就在外面打工,

  • "When you come to work, leave your emotions at the door."

    很早就被告知:

  • Then I learned what people meant by the word "professional."

    來上班的時候 要把我的情緒留在門外,

  • A very important part of it is to not have emotions.

    之後,又學到「專業」 這兩個字的定義。

  • Not to get angry when you encounter someone unreasonable.

    很重要的一部分是沒有情緒。

  • Not to cry when you feel sad.

    碰到再無理的人不可以生氣;

  • That's in the workplace.

    自己心裡再難過也不可以流眼淚,

  • At home, if you have a disagreement with your family,

    那是在職場上。

  • they might say to you, "Don't be so emotional."

    回到家裡,跟家人起了爭執,

  • Emotions: when you have them, it's like you've become a second-class citizen.

    動不動對方就會說: 「妳不要這麼情緒化好不好?」

  • What you say is reasonable but useless.

    情緒,一旦有了它,

  • Now you might say,

    好像就變成了二等公民,

  • "That's just your generation. Kids today are different.

    講的話再有理也沒有用了。

  • They have a well-rounded training from a young age."

    或許你會說:「那是你的年代,

  • Is that so?

    現在的小朋友不一樣哦, 從小就接受全方位的訓練。」

  • Early this year, we started a research project

    是這樣嗎?

  • to get elementary students to identify their emotions and develop their EQ.

    今年初,我們開始一項研究計劃,

  • In class we asked the children,

    是要教小學生認識情緒, 發展他們的EQ (情緒智商)。

  • "What is anger?

    上課的時候,

  • Do you remember the last time you were angry?"

    我們就問小朋友,

  • The children replied,

    生氣是什麼感覺啊?

  • "I don't know.

    你最近ㄧ次生氣是什麼時候 記不記得?

  • I don't. Mom and Dad say I shouldn't get angry.

    小朋友回答:

  • Our teacher says it's bad to get angry."

    「我不知道。」

  • As we can see, nobody seems to like having emotions.

    「沒有,爸媽說不可以生氣。」

  • Why hasn't evolution just gotten rid of them?

    「老師說,生氣是不好的。」

  • How have they managed to survive until today?

    情緒,這樣子一個不被人愛、

  • There are many reasons.

    沒有人要的東西。

  • An important one is that they can save lives.

    為什麼,它在演化的過程當中,

  • Maybe not as many lives as the previous speakers have,

    還沒有被淘汰掉?

  • but they can still save lives.

    為什麼它還可以存留到今天呢?

  • (Laughter)

    原因很多,

  • I once had a patient

    很重要的一個,是它可以救命。

  • who was a successful career woman on Wall Street.

    也許救的,沒有像 前幾位講者那麼多。

  • She first came to me hoping to get to know herself better

    但是還是可以救命。 (笑聲)

  • so she could develop her leadership skills and become a better leader.

    我曾經有ㄧ個病人,

  • She shared with me that when working in a male-dominated environment,

    是紐約華爾街上的女強人。

  • you can't reveal your weaknesses and frailties.

    她ㄧ開始來找我, 是希望能夠更認識自己,

  • After a long time working like this, you learn to suppress your emotions.

    能夠發展她的領導能力, 使她成為一個更好的領導者。

  • During the time I counseled her, she started having marital problems.

    她跟我分享,在這樣一個 以男性為主的環境上班,

  • Her relationship with her husband became unstable.

    是不可以顯露出自己軟弱 或脆弱的一面的。

  • One time during a fight,

    所以長期下來,

  • he picked up a glass from the table and flung it at her.

    會需要壓抑這方面的情緒。

  • She quickly got out of the way.

    在我們諮商的過程當中, 她的婚姻起了變化,

  • The glass hit the wall,

    跟先生的感情,變得不穩定。

  • and there were shards of glass everywhere.

    在一次爭吵的過程當中,

  • Afterwards, I asked her a question

    她先生拿起桌上的玻璃杯, 就朝她砸了過去。

  • that all psychologists eventually ask their patients:

    她很快的閃開了,

  • "How did you feel?"

    玻璃杯砸到牆上,

  • "How did you feel?"

    碎片一地都是。

  • She said, "I felt angry. How can he treat me like this?"

    那時候我問了她一句

  • I said, "What else?"

    所有心理醫生 遲早都會問病人的問題。

  • She said "I felt hopeless.

    How did you feel ?

  • When I first married him, he wasn't like this."

    你有什麼感覺啊?

  • Are there any emotions

    她說:「我很生氣, 你怎麼可以對我這樣子啊!」

  • that you think you'd have in this situation,

    我說:「還有呢?」

  • that she hadn't mentioned?

    她說:「我也很失望。 這個人,當初我嫁給他的時候,

  • Fear.

    不是這個樣子的。」

  • What happens when we're scared?

    請問,有沒有哪一些情緒, 是你們認為在這樣的情境底下,

  • We flee.

    應該有,而她沒有講到的?

  • What happens when we are angry?

    害怕。

  • We attack the other person.

    害怕的時候我們會怎麼樣?

  • If we can't correctly identify our emotions,

    逃跑。

  • instead of running away in fear,

    生氣的時候,又可能怎麼做呢?

  • we might think we're angry and attack someone;

    攻擊對方。

  • this can lead to very serious consequences.

    這時候如果情緒辨識錯誤, 我們應該害怕而逃跑的時候,

  • This woman had stifled

    卻以為我們很生氣, 而去攻擊對方,

  • and ran away from her emotions and insecurities for so long

    可能會產生很嚴重的後果。

  • that she had forgotten what it is to feel fear.

    這位女強人,長期的壓抑、 甚至轉移她脆弱、軟弱的情緒。

  • Her situation was urgent,

    以至於她已經不知道, 害怕是什麼感覺了。

  • and I couldn't teach her in such a short time

    情況有點緊急,

  • how to experience fear again.

    我不能在很短的時間之內, 叫她重新經歷害怕的感受。

  • So I don't have the chance to reestablish this kind of "circuit" in her brain.

    更沒有這樣子的機會, 讓她在大腦當中,

  • This is a diagram of the brain, the one you've just seen.

    重新建立這樣的迴路。

  • When we experience fear,

    這是一張大腦的圖, 剛剛之前你們已經看過了。

  • the information from the body's five senses -

    在這個害怕經歷的時候呢,

  • what we see, what we hear and so on -

    其實我們的身體, 是經由我們五官,

  • is passed from the thalamus

    眼睛看到的、耳朵聽到的等等,

  • to the sensory cortex for processing.

    把周圍相關的資訊, 經過我們的視丘,

  • The hippocampus, which is in charge of memory,

    傳到我們的感覺皮質去做處理。

  • will download the relevant information from the situation

    剛剛所提到的, 海馬迴負責記憶,

  • and send it to the amygdala for comparison.

    就會下載跟這些情境相關的記憶,

  • The amygdala stores our previous experiences of fear.

    把它送到杏仁核去做比對。

  • It evaluates the level of danger compared to past experiences

    杏仁核裡面儲存的是我們 過去緊急和害怕的經驗。

  • and then orders the hypothalamus to make an appropriate response.

    比對之後杏仁核會決定危險的程度,

  • You can see that in this circuit,

    然後再命令 我們的 hypothalamus,

  • past experiences and memories play a very important role.

    下視丘,去做適當的回應。

  • But we didn't have enough time to reestablish it.

    大家可以看到,在這樣的迴路當中,

  • So we could only work on awareness and recognition.

    過去的經驗跟記憶, 會扮演非常重要的角色。

  • I told this woman, "The next time this happens,

    而這個時候,沒有時間 再重新建立這樣的迴路了。

  • no matter how you feel, you have to call 911 immediately."

    所以我們只好從認知著手。

  • We went over it repeatedly,

    告訴這位女強人, 下一次這種情況發生的時候,

  • and in the end, there was a time when they fought again.

    你不管心裡面有什麼感覺, 請你馬上打電話給 911(報警)。

  • This time, her husband grabbed a knife.

    我們不斷的演練,反覆的練習,

  • Afterwards, she told me she was angry at the time,

    結果真的有一次,他們又吵架了。

  • she looked at him and hesitated for a few seconds,

    這一次,他先生 拿出來的就是一把刀。

  • but because of what we practiced, she eventually called 911.

    事後,她跟我說當時她很生氣,

  • Fortunately, the police arrived within 7 minutes

    看著他,猶豫了好幾秒鐘, 但是因為我們練習了好幾次,

  • and tragedy was avoided.

    最終她還是打了電話給 911。

  • Emotions can direct our actions and decide their consequences.

    還好警察在七分鐘之內, 就到達了現場。

  • Correctly identifying emotions can save your life.

    避免了一個悲劇的發生。

  • Of course, this is a more extreme example.

    情緒,可以主導我們的行為、 決定行為的後果。

  • On the less extreme side,

    正確的辨識情緒,是可以救命的。

  • our research keeps telling us that our physical and mental health,

    當然這是個比較極端的例子。

  • our academic achievements and job performance,

    在比較不極端的一方面, 我們過去的研究不斷的顯示,

  • our leadership skills and creativity

    情緒跟我們的身體、心理健康,

  • are all intimately related to our emotions.

    跟我們的學習、工作表現、

  • But what exactly are emotions?

    領導力、創造力, 都有密切直接的關係。

  • In fact, they're a kind of feeling,

    但是,情緒到底是什麼呢?

  • our own subjective experience.

    其實,它就是一種感覺。

  • They can be influenced by many things.

    一種屬於我們個人主觀的感受。

  • Like our thoughts and opinions.

    它會被很多東西影響。

  • They can also lead to different actions, like attacking someone.

    例如,我們的想法。

  • "I'm so angry because I think you tricked me!

    它也會造成一些不同的行為反應, 就像打人。

  • So I'm going to hit you."

    我很生氣,因為我認為你騙我了。

  • My thinking could be wrong because I misunderstood you.

    所以我就打你。

  • My behavior could also be wrong,

    我的認知可能有誤, 因為我誤會你了。

  • because I shouldn't hit people when I'm angry.

    我的行為可能不對, 因為再生氣也不能打人啊!

  • But feelings themselves aren't right or wrong,

    但是,感受本身, 是沒有是非、對錯、好壞的。

  • correct or incorrect, good or bad.

    在美國,常常聽到人家講一句話。

  • In the United States, you'll often hear people say,

    You shouldn't feel that way.

  • "You shouldn't feel that way."

    你不應該有這種感覺。

  • I hate it when people say that.

    我很不喜歡聽到這句話,

  • It's like if I said to you, "I'm so cold!"

    這就好比我跟你說:「我好冷噢!」

  • And you replied, "Then stop feeling cold!"

    你說:「欸,你不應該這麼冷耶!」

  • (Laughter)

    (笑聲)

  • This is your own subjective experience.

    這個是屬於你個人的主觀感受,

  • Nobody has the right to tell you

    沒有人有權利可以告訴你,

  • that what you're experiencing is right or wrong, good or bad.

    你這樣的感受,是對還是不對、 是好還是不好。

  • At this point you might ask,

    這時候你可能會想到,

  • "Are you saying that the criminals in prison

    監獄裡面的暴力犯。

  • got there just because of emotional problems?"

    不就是情緒出了問題, 才會做出這些事嗎?

  • I remember when I was in Taipei Prison evaluating them,

    我回想到在臺北監獄裡面, 給他們做評估的時候。

  • I asked them the same kind of question:

    我會問同樣的犯人同樣的問題:

  • "How did you feel when you did this?"

    「你當時做這樣事情的時候, 什麼感覺啊?」

  • They immediately responded, "I know. Pissed off!"

    他們不加思索,很快的就說: 「知道啊!就不爽(台語)。」

  • Then I asked, "So what could you do to feel a little better?"

    我繼續問:「那要怎麼樣做 你才會感覺比較好一點呢?」

  • They said, "I know!" right away.

    他說:「知道啊!」也是不加思索。

  • "I felt much better after beating them up."

    「我把他扁一頓就好過多了。」

  • (Laughter)

    (笑聲)

  • On the other hand, when I ask college students, "How do you feel?"

    相對的,我們的大學生,

  • They say, "I don't know."

    當我在問他們,你有什麼感覺?

  • (Laughter)

    大學生說:「我不知道。」

  • "Then, what could you do to feel better?"

    (笑聲)

  • "I don't know ..."

    「那要怎麼樣做 你才會感覺好一點呢?」

  • (Laughter)

    「不知道啊……」

  • So it would appear

    (笑聲)

  • that the prison inmates are much better at identifying and regulating emotions

    這樣子看來,監獄裡面的受刑人,

  • than college students.

    好像真的比我們的大學生, 在情緒的辨識跟調控方面,

  • The problem is how you express your emotions.

    都要好了很多。

  • All feelings are okay.

    問題是出自於 你如何表達你的情緒。

  • But even though it's okay to get angry, I shouldn't hit people.

    所有的感受都是 OK 的。

  • We taught elementary students about EQ, emotional quotient.

    但是,我是可以生氣,但不能打人。

  • How to correctly identify your emotions,

    我們教導小學生情緒智商, 這也是很重要的一環。

  • and the correct way of expressing them.

    如何正確辨識你的情緒,

  • All feelings are okay.

    而學習正確的方式 將它表達出來。

  • That doesn't mean all perceptions are true or that all behaviors are acceptable,

    所有的感覺都是 OK 的。

  • but all feelings are okay.

    並不是所有的認知都是正確的、 所有的行為都是可以接受的,

  • Even though all feelings are subjective experiences,

    但所有感覺都是 OK 的。

  • there are a few fundamental emotions

    雖然,所有的感覺 都是我們主觀的感受,

  • that every person will frequently have.

    還是有一些,我們所謂的基本情緒,

  • This goes across cultures.

    是每一個人,經常性都會擁有的。

  • Today, if you met someone

    這是跨文化的。

  • with a completely different background, culture, or language,

    今天當你在面對一個,

  • you'd still be able to correctly identify the six fundamental emotions

    跟你生活背景、個性、 甚至語言都完全不一樣的人的時候,

  • through their facial expressions.

    我們還是可以在他們的面部表情上,

  • Other emotions can be hard to distinguish because of cultural differences,

    正確的辨識出,這基本的六種情緒。

  • but everyone will frequently have these fundamental emotions.

    其他的情緒,可能會因為文化、 生長背景不同而有所差異。

  • Every time I talk about this in Chinese,

    但是基本情緒是個人、 每一個人經常性都會有的。

  • I'll hear people whisper the phrase "Happiness, anger, sorrow, joy."

    每一次用中文講到這邊的時候,

  • (Laughter)

    就會聽到有人在底下竊竊私語:

  • Happiness and joy are the same thing!

    喜怒愛樂。

  • So since we speak Chinese, we can guess those three.

    (笑聲)

  • What about the other three?

    喜跟樂是同一個系統的。

  • Surprise. Fear. Disgust.

    所以因為我們會講中文, 可以猜到三個基本情緒。

  • Everyone regularly experiences these emotions.

    其他三個呢?

  • But the intensity and outward expression of these emotions

    驚訝、憤怒、噁心。

  • will vary from person to person, and also depending on the situation.

    每ㄧ個人,經常性, 都會經歷這樣的情緒。

  • I once had a colleague who was a developmental psychologist.

    但是,所經歷的程度跟表達的方式,

  • He was also a very typical American.

    會因人而異。

  • He once asked me, "Hey, how often do you cry?"

    也會因情況不同而有所不同。

  • I said, "One or two times a year.

    我也曾經有個同事,

  • Maybe three."

    他是兒童心理學家,

  • He said, "Ah! That's so unhealthy!"

    也是一個很典型的美國人。

  • (Laughter)

    講到這個他就問我,

  • Obviously you don't think so, right?

    欸,你多久哭ㄧ次啊?

  • I said, "So how many times do you cry in a year?"

    我說:

  • He said, "Three times I cry a little, and five times I cry a lot."

    一年,一兩次……也許三次。

  • (Laughter)

    他說:「蛤 ?!那超不健康耶!」

  • Is that healthier?

    (笑聲)

  • Everyone gets sad, but that's not to say that whenever someone feels sad,

    顯然你們不這麼覺得對不對。

  • they necessarily will cry.

    我說,那你一年哭多少次啊?

  • The intensity and outward expression can differ.

    他說:「我是三天一小哭、 五天一大哭。」

  • I just said, everyone has these emotions regularly.

    (笑聲)

  • Looking at these six emotions,

    這樣你有比較健康嗎?

  • can you tell me, or rather tell yourself,

    都是悲傷,並不是每一個人, 每一次感受到悲傷的時候,

  • when was the last time you had them?

    都一定會流淚、甚至大哭。

  • If you say, "I don't remember,"

    程度跟表達的方式,會有所不同。

  • or you haven't felt them for a few months or a year,

    我剛剛講到,這是每一個人, 經常性都會有的。

  • that doesn't mean you haven't had them;

    你們看到這六種情緒,

  • rather, it means you haven't noticed them.

    能夠回答我,甚至回答你自己,

  • You ignored them,

    你最近一次經歷這個情緒, 是什麼時候嗎?

  • or perhaps you suppressed them or distracted yourself from them.

    如果你說,我記不得了,

  • If we look once more at the six fundamental emotions,

    甚至幾個月、一年都沒有了,

  • only one of them is positive: happiness.

    那並不代表你沒有經歷它們,

  • Surprise can be good or bad.

    而是代表你沒有注意到它們的存在。

  • The other four are all negative.

    你忽略了它們的存在, 甚至壓抑或轉移了它們。

  • Nobody likes negative emotions.

    我們再看到了這六種的基本情緒,

  • They feel bad.

    其中只有一種是正向的,就是快樂。

  • But they still have a reason for existence.

    驚訝,可好可壞。

  • They can warn you and let you know

    其他的四種,都是負面的情緒。

  • that if you don't make some changes, there could be danger.

    沒有人喜歡負面的情緒。

  • It's just like pain.

    它感覺不好。

  • Nobody likes pain.

    但是,它們確實有它們存在的價值, 跟它們的必要性。

  • But if I accidentally put my hand on top of a hot stove

    因為它們可以預警,讓我們知道,

  • and I didn't feel pain, I wouldn't know to withdraw my hand.

    如果你再不做一些改變, 可能會有危險啊。

  • Recently, there has been a worrying trend in developed countries:

    就像痛的感覺一樣,

  • people are trying very hard to avoid having negative emotions.

    沒有人喜歡痛。

  • Recently when I was in the United States, I went into a drugstore.

    但今天如果不小心, 把我的手放在熱爐上面,

  • Their drugstores are a bit like Watsons here in Taiwan.

    沒有痛的感覺, 我就不知道要把手抽回來。