字幕列表 影片播放 列印英文字幕 me Greetings. It is I the A Lone Ranger. We are back in our regular time slot with an abbreviated version of our show will be on for 1/2 an hour, followed by Nightline, and this will be the plan until the shackles come off. I hope you had a happy Easter. We had one of those family dinner video conferences. What our Easter was like a new yourself, Grandma, you have that we can hear hit on mute. It was less like in Easter dinner, more like I was hosting a non celebrity reboot of Hollywood squares. But that's what you do. Easter is a tough one during a pandemic. You know, every two minutes we're telling our kids to wash your hands and all of a sudden were like, Yes, go ahead and eat those jellybeans you found under a bush, our five year old Jane told my wife for real. I promise. If I see the Easter Bunny, I won't hug him. So some lifelong psychological traumas air definitely being formed here. I will say that as a parent, Easter makes you realize what a solid backstory Santa Claus has. Santa lives at the North Pole He has elves who make toys. He flies around reindeer. My kids where the Easter Bunny lives. I was like, I don't know, the sewer. This is good. This is what the Easter Bunny was up to in New Jersey yesterday. Cold, red. Sorry, kids. Everything you believe is a lie. It looks like the President has another enemy inside his administration. And unfortunately, that enemy is Dr Anthony Fauci. Doctor found she was on CNN with Jake Tapper yesterday. Jake asked him if casualties could have been prevented had the social distancing and stay at home. Order has been put in place sooner. And the answer was not exactly what Trump wants to hear his people saying. I mean, obviously you could logically say that if you had a process that was ongoing and you started mitigation earlier, you could have saved lives. Obviously, no one is going to deny that. Well, the president is the president is definitely going to deny that Trump was obviously not Please. He retweeted a post that include the hashtag timeto fire Fauci. Every time someone tells the truth, he gets mad. Is that a good sign? This tweet was written by a woman who is the author of a dating guide called Making Love Great Again, which sounds like a text. Trump would send his doctor after getting his see Alice prescription refilled, making Love great again. The spokesperson for the White House said the media chatter is ridiculous and that Trump is not firing Dr Fauci. So he is definitely firing. Dr. Fauci. Doctor found she wants to keep his job. He better find a way to blame this virus on Hunter, Biden and Quick. Maybe it wouldn't be so bad, though, if Trump fired, Found she. I mean, I, for one, might enjoy. See daily updates from Dr Joseph Exotic on March 24th which was less than three weeks ago. The president said he expected the country to be back up and running by Easter. But here's the thing. He didn't say which Easter. Maybe he meant next year or the year after that. Trump has no idea when the country will be open for business again, but that doesn't stop reporters from continually asking when the country will be open again. I want to get it open as soon as we can. We have to get our country open, Jeff, you say, sir, What metrics You were used to make that the metrics right here. That's my metrics. His tanning bronzer is his metrics. If my face is orange, the country will stay closed. But if we see it, shift the tangerine game on. And while it would undoubtedly be dangerous toe let people go back to work prematurely. The president seems convinced we're going to die either way. I just want to say that, you know, you talked about I couldn't lead to death. Meaning you open up, could lead to death. And you, right. But you know what? Staying at home leads to death. Also, maybe you've seen the movie and nightmare on Elm Street. Freddie gets a hold, dear. You're right in bed. You're done. Meanwhile, in the effort to end the era of Trump, Senator Bernie Sanders today officially endorsed Joe Biden in a joint livestream. And that's a very powerful message for the country. If to 80 year old men can successfully log into a zoom meeting, anything is possible. Sanders said that while he and Biden have real differences and they're not gonna paper over them, they need that paper for the bathroom. He will do everything he can to help Joe win the election. Masking every Democrat. I'm asking every independent. I'm asking a lot of Republicans to come together in this campaign to support your candidacy. I endorse. All right, Jack. Thank you very much, Chuck. Oh, no. Oh, no. Well, now all the Democrats have to do between now and November is keep Joe Biden in a Mylar bag like they get with vintage comic books. Schools have been closed for a month now, and a lot of students are finishing the year online. Which means a lot of parents are suddenly in the seventh and eighth grade. Again, every parent I know is complaining about having new algebra geometry, soldier studies, all those things. We be asked our way through the first time around our back to bite us on the home school asked. But fortunately, help is here. Our very own Guillermo is very good at this sort of thing. Not too many people know Guillermo scored a perfect 1600 on this s 80. So grab your Children, because here he is now your TV tutor. It's time for homework corner. Hello and welcome toe homework. order with Guillermo. Today's problem is the car travels at 65 miles per hour. How far you will travel in 90 minutes. Okay, so I think a car trouble a 60 miles and not okay. You get 65 miles on 90 minutes. Okay. Well, I think you should not be driving right now because the corner wires. So it stayed home. That's right. Who can argue with that?