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  • Hey there, it's Marie Forleo and you are watching MarieTV, the place to be to create a business and life you love.

    嗨,我是瑪麗‧弗萊奧,你現在收看的是瑪麗 TV — 教你開創完美人生與事業的頻道

  • Now, if you look closely, things may look a little different around here.

    如果你仔細看,會發現現場有點不一樣

  • If you look in the back, there's like my flowers on some wooden boxes.

    你看後面,我的花放在木箱子上

  • I don't have my normal stool, we got a little Dayquil in the house, what what? So here's what's happening.

    今天沒有高腳椅、這邊還有感冒藥。怎麼回事啊?事情是這樣的

  • I got a really bad cold. We have a shoot day today for MarieTV, we shoot a lot of episodes at once

    我患了重感冒,今天我們得拍攝一整天,一次錄好幾集瑪麗 TV

  • and when we got here, everything's set up but the furniture did not get delivered.

    我們到的時候一切準備就緒,傢俱卻沒送來

  • I'm sure you've had things in your life where things do not work out as planned and how do we roll?

    我相信你的人生中也有過事情不按計畫走的時候,那我們該怎麼辦?

  • The show must go on, so we're going to get into a little Q&A Tuesday action right now.

    節目還是要進行,所以直接進入週二 Q&A 時間吧!

  • This is going to be fun because my head's a little foggy from the Dayquil

    今天節目會很有趣,因為我吃了感冒藥有點神智不清

  • but we're going to have a good time. Alright, Let's do this.

    不過我們會很開心的,開始吧!

  • Today's question comes from Vanessa, and she writes:

    今天的問題來自凡妮莎,她寫道:

  • "Hi, Marie, thanks for all you do, here is my deal. I was with someone for the last 10 years,

    「嗨,瑪麗!謝謝妳做的一切,以下是我的問題。我跟某個人交往十年

  • we were engaged, he was the provider, I was pursuing acting and we had goals set up for our future.

    並且訂婚了,他負責家計而我追求演藝事業,未來目標已規劃妥當

  • We grew distant and long story short, he broke up with me a month ago.

    後來我們變得疏離,總之一個月前他跟我分手了

  • I'm starting my whole life over at 32 and feel lost. I'm unmotivated, broke and terrified about my future.

    在 32 歲時重新開始人生,我感到茫然。我既沒錢又缺乏動力,對於未來我很害怕

  • Will I be alone? Will I be too old to start a family? I'm trying and failing at being positive and having any kind of faith.

    我會孤獨一人嗎?會不會年紀太大嫁不出去?我試圖振作卻失敗,心中也毫無信念

  • How do I feel all these things and still move forward?

    我該如何在感受這些情緒的同時向前邁進呢?

  • I've accepted that I'm going to be in pain, but how do I work and keep from being constantly consumed by this?

    我已接受自己將身陷痛苦之中,但該如何努力而不被痛苦吞噬?

  • Thanks -- Vanessa."

    謝謝!」 凡妮莎上

  • Vanessa, this is such a great question. I am so happy that you wrote in.

    凡妮莎,這真是很棒的問題,我很高興妳寫信這封信

  • I don't know any person on the planet who can't remember a time in their own life when they felt shattered and lost.

    世界上所有人都經歷過人生茫然低潮的時期

  • In fact, when I was in my early 20s and I broke off my engagement,

    其實我 20 出頭的時候,也跟我未婚夫分手

  • I was such a mess that I moved home with my parents because I was completely devastated and I didn't know what to do.

    當時的我一團糟,只好搬回家與父母同住,因為我悲痛欲絕不知道該怎麼辦

  • I felt like a total failure both as a life coach and in my relationships.

    不論在感情或人生路上,我感到自己全然失敗

  • However, there were a few things that I did that helped me climb out of that misery.

    還好,當時我採取一些行動,成功幫我脫離苦難

  • The one thing I did right was I kept my bartending job. It was stable

    其一是我沒有放棄當調酒師的工作。這份工作很穩定

  • and it was something that I could just go to. I remember if my girl friends called, even if I didn't want to go out, I just went out.

    也不必花太多心力。我記得如果朋友約我出去,即使不想去我還是會去

  • I made it my focus to just do one thing at a time and really do just what was in front of me.

    我強迫自己一次只做一件事,真的只專注於眼前的事物

  • Now, maybe you don't have a bartending job to go to,

    也許妳不像我有工作可以分心

  • however, here are four key ideas that can help you start over and get past anything.

    但以下四點,幫助妳克服一切重新出發

  • Number one -- everything happens for a reason. This may sound like fluff, but it's a really useful framework for life.

    【重點一:事出必有因】聽起來像句廢話,其實是很實在的人生指標

  • You've got to remember that nothing has meaning besides the meaning that you give it

    你要了解事情本身沒有意義,除非妳賦予它意義

  • and it's up to you whether you choose to assign an empowering or disempowering meaning to this experience.

    對過去經歷感到積極或消極,完全取決於妳

  • If you go through life knowing that every problem is serving a greater purpose,

    走過人生,你會明白困境將成就更遠大的目標

  • somehow it's making you stronger and smarter,

    讓妳更堅強、更有智慧,

  • you're going to look for and find an empowering lesson in every situation. Someday you're going to say

    妳要在困境中尋找正面能量,有天妳會說

  • "if so-and-so didn't break up with me, I wouldn't have ____,"

    「如果某某人沒有跟我分手,我就不會____。」而這個空格

  • and that blank is going to be a beautiful surprise that you couldn't possibly predict right now.

    請填入妳所無法預想的美妙事物

  • Key idea number two -- pain is inevitable, suffering is optional. Vanessa, you wrote here:

    【重點二:傷痛無可避免,折磨一念之間】 凡妮莎,妳在信中寫道:

  • "I've accepted that I'm going to be in pain."

    「我已經接受自己將身陷痛苦之中」

  • Now when you say that, it's as though the pain is constant and it's going to last forever. Here's something I want you to know:

    妳這麼說好像痛苦是永恆的。現在我要妳知道

  • nothing lasts forever including pain. Pain only lasts if you resist it

    沒有任何事會持續至永恆 -- 包含痛苦。唯有當妳執意身陷泥沼

  • or if you dramatize it by telling yourself the same old "I'm a victim" story again and again and again.

    或是戲劇化的催眠自己是受害者,痛苦才會延續

  • So remember, pain is inevitable but suffering is optional.

    所以記得,「傷痛無可避免,折磨一念之間」

  • What you need to practice is allowing yourself to actually feel the pain, to experience it in your body without going into a mental drama about what it means.

    妳要練習真實感受痛楚,用妳的身體感官體驗,而不上演內心小劇場

  • What I mean by mental drama is getting lost in thoughts like

    所謂內心小劇場指的是妳迷失於

  • "why did this happen to me" or "will I be too old to start a family" or yada, yada, yada.

    「為什麼是我!?」、「太老沒人要怎麼辦?」之類的執念

  • All that stuff is a story that you're telling yourself that's not actually true

    這些都只是妳編出來不真實的故事

  • and if you just experience the physical pain of it without going into the mental drama,

    如果只用身體感受痛楚,而不胡思亂想

  • it'll be over before you know it. So, go ahead and feel the pain,

    痛苦將在妳察覺之前消失無蹤。所以,迎上前去感受痛苦吧!

  • maybe the sensations in your body is like a tightness in your chest or a heaviness in your belly, but remember,

    也許妳會以為身體飽受折磨,但記得

  • if you actually experience the physical sensations, the pain is never going to last more than it a few seconds.

    當妳實際去感受,這些身體疼痛隨即煙消雲散

  • Key idea number three -- make is-ness your business. Vanessa, a lot of what's holding you back right now

    【重點三:當前事物,才是首要之務】 凡妮莎,妳舉足不前的原因

  • is anxiety about the future or regrets about the past

    來自於妳對未來的徬徨、對過去的遺憾

  • and if you really break it down, the future and the past are just mental concepts. They don't really exist.

    抽絲剝繭來看,未來及過去都只是抽象概念,其實並不存在

  • The only thing that exists right now is this current moment: the present moment of now.

    唯一存在的,是當下的此時此刻

  • So the trick to getting yourself back on track is to become a master at living in the moment

    所以,重回正軌的秘訣是專注於當下

  • because the truth is you are capable of handling anything that happens in this current moment of now.

    因為事實上,妳有能力掌握現況

  • I call this practice "making is-ness your business."

    我稱之為「活在當下」的練習

  • In fact, I wrote a whole chapter on it in my book Make Every Man Want You.

    事實上我的書《讓每個男人迷上你》中,有一整章在探討這點

  • Making is-ness your business means giving your full attention and focus to this moment, whatever is happening right now.

    要妳不論發生什麼事,都能全神貫注於當下

  • So you've got to ask yourself: can I handle what's actually happening in this moment of now?

    妳得問自己:眼前這件事我應付的了嗎?

  • Not your drama filled thoughts about what's happening, but the reality of what's happening in this moment.

    不是透過戲劇化的臆想,而是專注於現實

  • For example, is your heart beating right now? Yes. Perfect. Are you breathing right now?

    比如說,妳的心臟在跳動嗎?是的,很好!妳在呼吸嗎?

  • Yes. Awesome. Then you've handled this moment. Now that moment is over and you're in a new moment.

    是的,棒呆了!這一刻掌握在妳手中。而現在上一刻結束下一刻開始

  • Play this game long enough and you'll condition yourself to be engaged in your real life

    長時間持續這個練習,妳會發現自己專注於現實

  • instead of your thoughts about your life.

    而非腦海中關於人生的猜想

  • Number four -- do the basics one day at a time.

    【重點四:順其自然,隨遇而安】

  • The key to build momentum and getting back on track is to take everything one day at a time.

    讓妳恢復動力、回歸正軌的關鍵在於「順其自然」。它之所以為人稱頌

  • So there's a reason that it's a theme song and it's a cliché; it works. Here's what you got to do:

    甚至變成老生長談是有原因的 - 因為有用!以下是妳該做的:

  • you got to eat real good food today. Exercise your body today. Do what needs to be done today.

    「今天」吃健康的食物、「今天」去運動、「今天」做完該做的事

  • Not for the whole week, not for the month, not for the rest of your life; just do it today,

    別去想下週、下個月、或是下半輩子,只專注於今日!

  • especially if you don't feel like doing something. Do it anyway. I'm sure you've experienced this.

    尤其當妳意興闌珊的時候,更要去做!我相信妳有過這種經驗

  • you say you don't want to go to the gym but you get yourself there and you work out and

    雖然不想健身,但妳強迫自己去健身房

  • you're like "oh my god, I'm so glad that I came,"

    之後覺得「天啊~真高興我有來!」

  • or your friends ask you to go out and you really don't want to go out but you suit up and you go out anyway

    或是雖然不想面對朋友,但妳終究打理好出門

  • and then you come home and you're like "oh my god, that was so awesome, I'm so glad I went."

    回家後才覺得「天啊!棒透了~幸好我有去」

  • So focus on the basics one day at a time and before you know it, you are going to be back on track.

    順其自然的面對生活中的大小事,妳的生活將很快步入正軌

  • Before we wrap this up, I want to leave you with a beautiful tweetable from Mary Tyler Moore

    結束之前,我要送給妳瑪莉泰勒摩爾

  • and she says:

    一則很美的推文

  • "Pain nourishes courage. You can't be brave if you've only had wonderful things happen to you."

    「勇氣從痛苦中茁壯 -- 若生命總是順遂,妳將學不會勇敢。」

  • Vanessa, that was my A to your Q. Thank you so much for asking and do let us know how it goes.

    凡妮莎,以上是我的回答。謝謝妳提出問題,請讓我知道後續進展

  • Now I would love to hear from you. Have you ever felt shattered and lost and

    現在我想聽聽大家的意見。妳們曾經陷入混亂迷惘中

  • had trouble getting started again? What did you do to get back on track?

    難以重新開始嗎? 妳用什麼方法幫助妳重回正軌?

  • Whether it's an idea from this video or something completely different, I would love to hear from you.

    不論是影片裡的建議或其它方法,我都很樂意知道你們的意見

  • As always, the best action happens over in the comments section at Marieforleo.com

    一如往常,到 Marieforleo.com 的討論區留言是最棒的回饋!

  • so go there and leave a comment now.

    現在就請前往官網留言

  • So did you like this video where our set is kinda half created and I'm all hyped up on cold medicine?

    所以,即使是佈景很克難、感冒藥讓我有點 high,妳仍喜歡這部影片嗎?

  • If so, subscribe to our channel and share it with your friends,

    如果是,請訂閱我們的頻道並與朋友們分享

  • and if you want even more great resources to have a business in life that you love plus some personal insights from me that I only talk about in e-mail,

    想知道更多開創自己事業的撇步,以及電子報的專屬內容嗎

  • and if you're lucky, I'll have even more cold medicine,

    在我感冒藥吃完之前妳有福啦!

  • get your butt over to MarieForleo.com and sign up for e-mail updates.

    快進入 MarieForleo.com 加入會員,就可以收到最新消息

  • Stay on your game and keep going for your dreams. The world needs that special gift that only you have.

    持續努力追求夢想,這個世界需要妳獨一無二的天賦

  • Thank you so much for watching and I'll see you next time on MarieTV.

    感謝收看,下週見!

Hey there, it's Marie Forleo and you are watching MarieTV, the place to be to create a business and life you love.

嗨,我是瑪麗‧弗萊奧,你現在收看的是瑪麗 TV — 教你開創完美人生與事業的頻道

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A2 初級 中文 美國腔 凡妮莎 痛苦 感冒藥 正軌 人生 瑪麗

【生命教育】當你感到失落時該怎麼辦? (Feeling Lost)

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    阿多賓   發佈於 2016 年 08 月 22 日
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