• US /ˈkɑŋɡrɪs/
  • UK /'kɒŋɡres/
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  • n. 美國國會;; 國會;
  • Senator Hodges attended the Congress hearing last night
  • We will need to convene a congress to deal with the economic crisis
  1. Do-Nothing Fucktards who couldn't solve a problem if it was eating them alive anus first.
    If Congress isn't stopped, it will bring about complete economic collapse.
  2. The act of sexual procreation between a man and a woman; the man's penis is inserted into the woman's vagina and excited until orgasm and ejaculation occur.
    They had congress.
  3. Where lobbyists go to buy their laws.
    Big Corporation: Hmm this toxic waste dumping regulation seems to be affecting our business. Lobbyist: No problem I'll just pop down to Congress and buy a new one.
  4. The opposite of PROGRESS. PRO = Good CON = Bad
    GUY 1: Hey, man, did you hear about what the government's working on in D.C.? GUY 2: Yeah, but it's not gonna get us anywhere good. They're the Congress.
  5. A group of elected officials from a single racial and economic demographic creating a large amount of rules that have never been actually read by anyone. These rules affect a large group of people who they have never met and don't care about.
    Kyle: today at the office my boss gave himself a raise & denied all employee paid vacation requests. Mark: Ohh he pulled a Congress
  6. Congress usually refers to the national legislative body of a country. However, congress is a term also used for a group of baboons. That there are obvious similarities between these groups should be pretty obvious to most.
    Consider a group of Baboons, they are the loudest, most dangerous, most obnoxious, most viciously aggressive and least intelligent of all primates. And what is the proper collective noun for a group of baboons? Believe it or not ....... a Congress! I guess that pretty much explains the things that come out of Washington!
  7. A gathering of sorts in which useful ideas are proposed, debated, debated some more, revised to please some moronic babbling baboons whose only goal in life is to make yours miserable, revised a final time, voted upon, and usually rejected. Also synonymous with ["Animal Farm"], ["Yellow pages"] (some brilliant jackass found a way to waste time and reveal the phone numbers and addresses of several hundred Americans), and rarely, ["Progress"]. Current place of residence is in two buildings, one of which strikingly resembles a single female breast.
    Person 1: "Yo man, you seem them Reps battle it out in [Congress] last night? That shit was teh SHIT! I mean, when the dude from Connecticut pulled out the chainsaw, I was all, 'YEAH!!! F-ing A! GO AMERICA! LIBERTY OR FUCKING DEATH, BITCH!'." Person 2: "You SO belong in Congress, dude."
  8. A legislative body that has the real power. They fund and create laws and programs, impeach, and confirm appointments. The president almost always has to get past them before anything can be done. I can understand why its easy to blame the president for everything that is wrong because there is only one president and hundreds of congresspeople, but if you really want to have a voice, get off your butt and contact your local congressperson
    Write to your local Senator or Congressperson
  9. A group of people so corrupted by money that they have no idea how the normal American thinks, but apparently knows enough to tell us what we can and cannot do.
    Man From Congress: Who in here would honestly sell their private jet and fly commercial?
  10. A large group of older men who probably have penis sizes lower than average. They enjoy finding things they dislike, or don't control, and trying to destroy/ruin them. They think mainly of themselves and don't mind destroying a few lives to make a quick buck. They avoid taxes and keep their millions of dollars to themselves, and think that those who are poor need to stay poor and they need to stay on top. They recently tried to steal the internet, but where shot down. They also believe that constitutional rights aren't really that important, and can be bent to their liking.
    SOPA/ACTA/PIPA are all acts of the Congress. They can be compared to the Church during the middle ages. Take from the poor, keep it for yourself.